I belong to Jesus

Hey guys, especially proud and self-assuringly, self-sufficient Christians like myself. You're nothing like who you think you are. You and I are bums, we need a savior. Come clean, come humble, come low, without judgment, without acclaim, without conceit. Believe the Gospel with our hearts - we can't save ourselves anymore, we need Jesus. Ain't this fantabulously great news? Wow. Just when you thought you'd ace it... Just when I thought I've got it all covered. Boom. 

Heav’n above is softer blue, Earth around is sweeter green!
Something lives in every hue Christless eyes have never seen;
Birds with gladder songs o’erflow, flowers with deeper beauties shine,
Since I know, as now I know, I am His, and He is mine.
(George Robinson)

You don't know. You wouldn't.

The average chap doesn't really get much thought going bout his/her funeral songs. In an absolutely un-suicidal note and perspective, here's shoo-in song #1 for mine. So stoked to say goodbye to the former things - 

"He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be mo more, neither sha;; there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away." (Revelation 21:4)

All My Tears - Jars of Clay

When I go don't cry for me
In my Father's arms I'll be be
The wounds this world left on my soul
Will all be healed and I'll be whole



Sun and moon will be replaced
With the Light of Jesus' face
And I will not be ashamed
For my Savior knows my name



It don't matter where you bury me,
I'll be home and I'll be free.
It don't matter where I lay,
All my tears be washed away.

Gold and silver blind the eye
Temporary riches lie
Come and eat form heaven's store,
Come and drink, and thirst no more



It don't matter where you bury me,
I'll be home and I'll be free.
It don't matter where I lay,
All my tears be washed away.

So, weep not for me my friends
When my time below does end
For my life belongs to Him 
Who will raise the dead again.



It don't matter where you bury me,
I'll be home and I'll be free.
It don't matter where I lay,
All my tears be washed away.

PS: An evident penchant for eye photos simply because eyes reflect and open windows into the Gospel, in their own ways. Look at death, and be free, choose victory in death. (Philippians 1:21)

Always, everyday feeling like giving up.
But not in the lazy kind of way -
More so the "its really impossible to do this on my own" kind of way:
With empty hands.



They say don't waste your time
You simply cannot find an ounce of good within the heart of man
They say we've got to lay in the bed we've made and live this life without a second chance but
I'm inclined to say there must be something more.
We've been told that the heart is just too far gone to save
But grace tells us another story
Where glory sends hopelessness away
Oh grace tells us another story. 
(Mercyme, Grace Tells Another Story)

Thus says the LORD: 
"The people who survived the sword
found grace in the wilderness;
when Israel sought for rest, 
the LORD appeared to him from far away.
I have loved you with an everlasting love;
therefore I have continued my faithfulness to you.
(Jeremiah 31:2-3)

Think I'd really be dead, lifeless dead. If not for Grace.

The world carries on as though love, community, compassion and personal relationships are the greatest things. Yet the world cannot ground this intuition in ultimate reality. The materialist says we are the product of time and chance, the unitarians says we are the product of a supreme will, the polytheist says we're the product of chaotic forces. Love, in such universes, is only a gloss. Push deeper and it's impersonal powers that rule. (Glen Schriver)



All my life, and for whats left of it, I have and will be searching for real love. Not the kind of fluffy infatuation and elation-engined romance but the genuine substantial brand. Nothing has come, so far, probably ever, close to that of God's love, and its not because He merely sent some kid called Jesus down to die for a bunch of people who enjoy picturing Him in bearded splendor more than anything else about Him. "Love in such universes, is only a gloss." - and nothing we define nor conjure can concoct love. Heck, the idea of love doesn't even seem adequate in the word "love" itself. Thats if your love is that cosmic, or as we all want ours to be. 

I found love in the Trinity. Like many of the ones (both dead and alive, well both figuratively and literally) who really enjoyed a relationship with Jesus helped me discover that. That's Father, Son and Spirit, 3 persons who knew how to love and 3 who are love. Because if God didnt' know what love is, He'd be like the "awkward single guy",trying to chat people up and show them what love is (Mike Reeves), and that is simply, strange, as we (guys?) know it. 

Love, we all think we know it. I found it (and also this brilliant article about the Trinity - http://www.theologynetwork.org/christian-beliefs/doctrine-of-god/starting-out/the-trinity-saved-my-life.htm). Or rather, it found me. (Galatians 4:9) Because Jesus brings us to the Father, and we all need a relationship as full and sufficient as this.

Apart from the rudimentary functions of 2 years of military service, its pretty inarguable that the boys have had close to 2 years more than the girls to ponder their future. 2 years to actually think, ruminate, and compose yourself can be life-changing. Thats 2 years of thinking v.s. 2 years of doing. Maybe one day, we'll see this down the long, winding path - if, at the least, we're on one anyway. God works in our myriad seasons. 

At probably one of the lowest points in my life right now - in every single aspect, I recognize utter inadequacy and incompetency - being a Christian, son, brother, boyfriend, friend, leader, follower, worker, absolutely cracking. Many expectations to meet at the moment, but I barely meet mine, what more others'. Its been entirely frustrating to grapple with a futile work at times, in relationships and ministry. Its absolutely devastating to look myself in the mirror and be convinced that there is a confidence I can count on deep within, that there is worth in this depraved face of dust. Absolutely imperfect, and helpless through and through.



Hear my cry, O God
Listen to my prayer;
from the end of the earth I call to you
when my heart is faith.
Lead me to the rock that is higher than I,
for you have been my refuge,
a strong tower against the enemy.
(Psalm 61:1-3)

Going back to the Word helps, cause the Gospel is Good, Great News in times like this. And Jesus the Immovable Rock when everyone fades away, eroded by emotions, opinions. 

O Light that followest all my way,
I yield my flickering torch to thee;
my heart restores its borrowed ray,
that in thy sunshine's blaze
its day may brighter, fairer be.

Witholding what I can, because the time isn't right.

United's flag is deepest red
It shrouded all our Munich dead
Before their limbs grew stiff and cold
Their heart's blood dyed it's ev'ry fold
Then raise United's banner high,
Beneath it's shade we'll live and die,
So keep the faith and never fear
We'll keep the Red flag flying here
We'll never die, we'll never die
We'll never die, we'll never die
We'll keep the Red flag flying high,
Because Man United will never die.

In memory of the Busby Babes, the Flowers of English Football, the Flowers of Manchester.

The ones who went before Georgie Best, Cantona, Giggsy, Becks and Roons. Legacy.

Being in love is a good thing, but it is not the best thing. There are many things below it, but there are also many things above it. You cannot make it the basis of a whole life. It is a noble feeling, but it is still a feeling. [...] But of course, ceasing to be "in love" need not mean ceasing to love. Love in this second sense - love as distinct from "being in love" is not merely a feeling. It is a deep unity, maintained by the will and deliberately strengthened by habit; reinforced by the grace which both as, and receive, from God. (C. S. Lewis)

Brilliant. Exactly everything I believe in.